I prepped Ammon and the kids in the days before our "Family Meeting". I wanted them to really have a couple of days to think about some things they wanted to work on for the New Year so it wasn't just jotting random things jotted down on a piece of paper.
This year, I've had a different perspective on goal making then in years past. Instead of just making goals for this year, we first talked to the kids about LIFE GOALS and that the whole purpose of making these little goals, was the perspective of getting through this life by making smaller goals that help us attain larger ones. My favorite blogger said it best. Goals help you "Start somewhere, and keep moving".
So this time, we had a good long talk with the kids about Short Term Goals (for 2013) but more importantly their Long Term Goals (things they would decide now that they evenutally want in life). We talked about marriage, missions and college, but we also brought up points like deciding now and making a "goal" of waiting until they are 16 to date, dressing modestly, never drinking alchohol, and never touching drugs (Ethan just graduated from the DARE program). Decisions that they can make at 10, 8 or 7 that will help influence decisions they make along the way until they get to some bigger destinations. Decisions that when they are faced with a hard situation as teenagers down the road, they will already have their answer decided because of early "goals" they are sticking too.
For instance, we told Ethan that to get his Eagle, he has to make little steps now like completing his Arrow of Light and Webelos badge in the next four months. He couldn't just decide when he was fourteen or sixteen that then he would earn his Eagle in a day.
We talked about how if they want to marry someone in the temple later on, they have to begin by making good choices in life now and with who they will eventually date and how they will carry themselves.
It was a great discussion and they grasped it so much better than we anticipated. Of course, these discussions about the future and long term goals are far from over, but it was a good start on the process.
Here are pictures of their goal charts...I LOVE their spelling, how personal they each are and what they are working on. They also know that this is a big year with the move coming up and some of these goals, like making 3 new friends, will be very important in the upcoming months.
Ethan
Brynlee-I love how Brynlee's long term goals include "being a mom".
Hailey-Love that she has a goal of staying up until midnight next New Year's Eve! She fell asleep at 11:15pm this last year and was so bummed about it. ;-)
Karli
Ammon's goals were more personal so I didn't include his paper on here but they were along the lines of graduating, doing another triathalon, starting his new job, passing ABSITE at the end of this month, and all his boards by this summer. He's got a big year ahead.
And that brings me to myself. I had to think a lot about this year for me especially since nothing is solid right now. This year is a very atypical year. Normally I make the same goals...lose weight, read something, get organized and so on. This year with a new baby coming, a move across the country and kids in all stages of life, I knew I had to be easier on myself. There are just too many changes on the horizon to have a lot of definate, solidfied goals this year. Nothing is concrete right now...everything I base my life on, with the exception of my family and the gospel, is changing... our home, the city we live in, weather, my body, the number of kids in our family, our car situations, friends, etc. So much change..
So my "word" or phrase for this year is to
EMBRACE CHANGE
or in other words to....
welcome
accept
seize
grasp
adopt
and embody the things that come my way.
This is so new for me. I like being planned. I like being sure of things and I like things solid. Alan Cohen said, "It takes a lot of courage to release the familiar and seemingly secure, to embrace the new . . . There is more security in the adventurous and exciting, for in movement there is life, and in change there is power."
Life is always changing and evolving and this reminds me that a full life, one with new adventures, can be found in movement and in change. Although I don't like changing things often, I have to remember that this year can be full of new memories and a lot of growth for me and our family. And in "change there is power"...I will be only one that can decide on how I move forward and handle things, and how I am going to present myself in this new life. I have the power to choose my own attitude and I hope I can remember to embrace the changes instead of fighting them or letting them ruin my happiness.
And a couple of other things that I CAN have the power to choose, regarding our situations and mostly just for fun:
2. Read the Book of Mormon as a Family but more importantly have MORNING scripture study this year which means since Ammon is at work, that's mainly on my shoulders. That's a first for me. Our nights are just too busy with activities and things the kids are involved in. And those are important and GOOD things...but so is the time reading the scriptures, pondering them and involving them in our life. So the change this year is to start the day with reading scriptures and after the last few days, there has been a change in our home. More peace, more getting done, more going RIGHT.
Our reward for finishing this year will be to finally, FINALLY take the kids to Disneyland for the first time...hooray!
3. Catch up all five kids' scrapbooks using elements from Project Life (and I can happily say that halfway into January I'm 50% caught up on Ethan's!). My biggest priority is downsizing and organizing ALL their school paperwork since Kindergarten for each of them before the baby comes and the move.
4. Run a race of some type. I'm not holding myself to anything since I don't know the toll yet this new baby will take on my body, but since California stays much warmer then Ohio year round, I have a much better chance of doing this...especially in the fall. So maybe a 5K, maybe a half marathon...we'll see but it's a start.
5. Have a date with Ammon a month, not neccessarily GO on a date with Ammon once a month. It doesn't mean we have to even leave the house. We are getting more creative...we have to with this many kids...but we got a total of like two dates in 2012. So at least once a month, and the kids are getting used to this, we have to plan something or time just for us.
6. If I say I'm going to do something and commit to it, then I need to do it and not come up with excuses or complain about it. I have a tendency to say "no" with my brain and "yes" with my mouth and then I grumble about it. I have to remember that I the power to say "no" if I don't want to do it or if it's not right for my family. This gives me so much more freedom and a new outlook as I create myself in our new surroundings. With no one knowing me or my abilities or talents, I can start new and go from there.
7. Visit three new places...we are thinking Mount Rushmore might be one of them.
8. Stay out of credit card debt for 2013. We are doing awesome with this so far...still have debt but NOT credit card debt.
9.Focus on my kids as individuals, not so much as a "group". More personalized parenting. This was our focus for last year and I think Ammon and I did pretty well with this. We got to know the kids a lot better and I want to continue this.
We've committed to going over these goals and our progress every couple of months and finally reviewing them on New Year's Eve this next year. It will be interesting to see how far we've each come.
We've committed to going over these goals and our progress every couple of months and finally reviewing them on New Year's Eve this next year. It will be interesting to see how far we've each come.
1 comments:
you are amazing!
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